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Chapter 1183 — Everyone's Got the Runs

The Blossom Guardian

"I'm so angry I could die!" Gou Huli was beside herself with fury, and yet there was not a single thing she could do about it.

Shen Yushu carried the beef back into the villa, grinning all the way. "Arrow Bro, Gou Huli gave us some beef. Take a look and see if there's anything wrong with it?"

Wei Zhao hadn't gone out, but he had watched the whole business from inside the house. He took the beef Shen Yushu handed him, examined it closely, gave it a sniff, touched it with his tongue, and only then said, "It's fine. Very fresh. I'll cook it for you tonight."

"Ooh, that old broad's got a good heart!" Shen Yushu clapped her hands and cheered.

"But this piece is too big. The three of us can't finish it. Cut off more than half and give it to the lion at the gate," Wei Zhao said.

"Okay!" Shen Yushu carried the beef off to the kitchen in high spirits, cut away a big chunk, then came back to the villa gate and tossed the meat to the lion. "Little Lion, this meat is your reward. You did very well. Keep it up!"

The lion shook its head, caught the beef Shen Yushu threw to it, and seemed to be thanking her.

Gou Huli, watching from the courtyard gate, was so enraged she nearly fainted on the spot! That meat — she had bought it!

Gou Huli was so miserable she wanted to spit blood. This damned lion, so utterly ungrateful! Fine. If you won't show me any kindness, don't blame me for showing you none!

In her rage, a nasty idea came to Gou Huli in a flash. She got into her sports car and drove off once more toward the vegetable market!

This time she bought a big chunk of pork. But she didn't leave right away. Instead she found a little pharmacy and bought a bottle of phenolphthalein tablets — laxatives.

Out of the pharmacy, Gou Huli found herself a spot to sit, crushed all the tablets to powder, and mixed it into the meat, working it in until the powder had dissolved completely and nothing could be seen. Only then did she cackle and drive back toward the villa district.

She came again to the gate of the Gu family villa, got out of the car with the pork in hand, and, putting on the same eager, "persevering" act as before, called to the lion: "Little Lion, I've come to see you again! I bought you your favorite pork. Won't you come home with me?"

As she spoke, Gou Huli waved the pork in front of the lion. And this time the lion did exactly as before: it walked over, seized the plastic bag from her hand at once, carried it to the villa door in its teeth, and rapped on the door with its front paws.

After a while Shen Yushu came out again. Looking at the plastic bag in the lion's mouth, she was suddenly baffled. Was Gou Huli brain-dead? She'd already been made a fool of once — and now a second time? Did she have a taste for losing, or simply no memory at all?

But Shen Yushu said nothing. She took the plastic bag from the lion's mouth and glanced at Gou Huli not far away. "Thank you, you old broad — bringing us food again!"

"Waaah, waaah, waaah! I'm so angry!" Gou Huli shrieked, putting on a show of utter rage.

Shen Yushu carried the bag back to the living room and said, somewhat suspiciously, "Arrow Bro, why is Gou Huli sending us food again? Is something wrong with it?"

"Let me see." Wei Zhao took the meat she handed him, glanced at it, sniffed it, rubbed a finger over the surface and tasted it on his tongue. Then he said, "It's been dosed with laxatives."

"Ah!" Shen Yushu was startled, then furious. "I knew Gou Huli couldn't be that kind! After the beef, she sends us a big chunk of pork — isn't she an idiot? Sure enough, there's something wrong with it!"

"General Mighty, come here," Wei Zhao said instead, beckoning.

At Wei Zhao's summons, General Mighty naturally came scampering over and wagged its head at him.

"Take this to Gou Huli's kitchen, and mind that no one sees you! Just put it in the kitchen and come back!" Wei Zhao ordered General Mighty.

"Woof, woof!" General Mighty barked twice, took the bag from Wei Zhao's hand in its teeth, and was off.

Watching General Mighty go, Shen Yushu doubled over with laughter. "Wahaha! Arrow Bro, you're so wicked! Little Shu hadn't even thought of how to teach that old broad Gou Huli a lesson, and you came up with such a wicked scheme first. Wahaha — her whole family will be fighting over the toilet tonight!"

"Heh... Gou Huli has only herself to blame," Wei Zhao said, unbothered. After all, he hadn't done a thing. The laxative was Gou Huli's own doing — what did that have to do with him?

Once Gou Huli saw Shen Yushu go inside and fail to come out again, she was terribly pleased with herself. It looked as though that idiot Shen Yushu had taken the pork inside! As soon as they ate it, they could sit and wait on the toilet!

That evening the Xiao family dinner was a lavish affair. It was the first day on the job for the Xiao family's new maid. After Mother Yu left, Gou Huli had found another full-time maid through a domestic service agency, responsible for cleaning and cooking at the Xiao household every day.

And since it was her first day, the maid had naturally cooked several fine dishes to show off her skill — partly, of course, to win the Xiao family's approval.

Looking over the array of home-style dishes on the table, Gou Huli was quite satisfied. This maid was decent enough; she supposed she could keep her for now. Gou Huli decided not to go looking for faults to send her packing.

The whole Xiao household, old and young, along with the two experts of the Pi family, sat around the table and ate their fill. Everyone ate with gusto, Gou Huli most of all — because today she had put the Gu family in their place, and she was certain that tonight not a soul in the Gu family villa would get a peaceful night's sleep!

On the table were braised pork, sweet-and-sour pork, and all manner of home-style meat dishes. The Xiao family had eaten so many delicacies in their time that these plain dishes tasted all the more delicious to them.

Gou Huli ate a great deal, and ate her fill.

But once the whole family had eaten and drunk their fill, the trouble began!

First it was Xiao Wangba and Xiao Wangdao: their stomachs began to rumble. Both were young men who ate heavily, meat especially, so it was only to be expected that they were the first to react.

And so the two of them started running for the toilet.

Next came Gou Huli. Because of her mood that day, she too had eaten a good deal, and plenty of meat besides, so she likewise began making endless trips to the toilet... After her came Xiao Ji and Xiao Ben and Xiao Ben's wife, and last of all the two experts from the Pi family.

Though the two Pi family experts had eaten no small amount either, their constitutions were tough, and so they held out until the very end before their bodies reacted.

Luckily the Xiao family lived in a villa — every floor had a bathroom, and every bedroom had one of its own, which was the only reason they could keep up with the demand. Otherwise these people would likely have had to run outside in search of a toilet!

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